Watch: Seven keys on how (not) to run a country. No prizes for guessing the inspiration
‘So follow these steps, and with a couple of billions, some white privilege and a fully functioning Twitter account, you too, can be President.’
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According to poet Rutwik Deshpande, it is not all that difficult to run a country. Or, at least, to set a (terrible) precedent. Inspired by the life and times of Donald Trump and his year as the President of the United States, Deshpande explains the tricks in his poem (above) How To Be President: US Edition. Turns out, all it takes is seven easy steps:
- Building a wall that is “tall enough and thick enough, to stop love from penetrating”.
- Objectify women and “show them where they belong”.
- Ban a religion “because they’re all terrorists”.
- Destroy the environment and don’t worry about climate change because “it is like a fairy tale”.
- Help your friends “at the expense of a few other people”.
- Look after your children because “competency is no measure in real estate and politics”.
- Make foreign friends “perhaps from a country famous for vodka”.
Follow these seven easy steps, and voila! you can become the next leader of your country. Indian politicians can definitely learn a thing or two from this primer. (Please don’t.)